Rejection

Hey all,

On Wednesday of this week I received an email of rejection from Dom, the direction of GVI Phoenix. I will not be returning to GVI to work as a project manager, as I had so wanted to do. It is a possibility in the future, he said, but right now I am not quite ready for management.

I like to think I have taken the rejection in stride, but I know it has affted me deeply, and I have been showing my disappointment in the classroom and around the kids. I need to constantly remind myself that I am still here to teach and the rest of my time here, no matter how short, needs to be dedicated to serving them, teaching them, and, above all, loving them. They have become everything and more to me. I cannot bear the thought of never seeing them again, but I have to come to terms with the fact that I never may.

What hurts the most is knowing that I have so much to offer. I know, inside of me, that I could do a better job than anyone else can.

I will push through. I will keep going. I will never stop. My life is for these kids. Maybe, in the future, not these exact kids, but they have touched me in a way that no one else has, provided me with a perspective that I would have otherwise been without.

I believe, and I know, that our fingerprints never disappear from the lives that we touch. They may diminish,they may fade, they may be forgotten, but they never disappear. Our experiences, our past, is held within, is our talisman for all those we have touched and who have touched us. These kids, these simple children with nothing and no one, have left their profound mark on me, and I them. And we are both better for it. They have prepared me to live the life that I know I must, and I have given them love and happiness and hope. Hope.